Bernie Sanders is taking to Twitch to livestream some of his meetings. If he were actually going to play some games, here is what I think would make for some great stream fodder.
With Bernie Sanders setting up a Twitch channel to stream some of his behind the scenes political meetings, I thought it would be fun to imagine a world where the Presidential hopeful takes to Twitch to stream games instead. Bernie and his political team want to take you behind the scenes of the political machine to show you to real people who are working to change policy, but I want to have a bit of fun. So, which games should Bernie stream on Twitch?
Papers, Please
Papers, Please was developed by Lucas Pope and released back in 2013. That feels like a lifetime ago, not a mere six years. In the game, you play a border checkpoint inspector in the fictional country of Arstotzka. You must check new arrival’s documents using different tools, and your instincts, to decide who is allowed in, and who must stay outside the country. You earn money based on your performance, and messing up will cost you some income, which will impact your ability to care for your family. What will you do when it comes to a choice between feeding your family or heating your home?
Will Bernie’s stance on immigration stand up, or will he go full gamer, looking for the perfect run of refusals?
Democracy 3
In Democracy 3, from developers Positech Games, you need to run the country. All of modern life’s significant issues need to be dealt with. Crime, unemployment, national debt, terrorism, climate change, international relations, and more all need solutions. It uses a custom-designed neural net to model individual voters, from their political leanings to their economic status. It’s an exciting game and would make for good Twitch fodder while Bernie gets a chance to show us all that he can indeed lead a country, and come up with workable solutions to complex problems.
Can he run a country? Put him to the test in Democracy 3, and no save-scumming allowed!
Civilization V
Yes, Civilization VI exists, but Civilization V is the better game, and Twitch is all about those viewing numbers, so this is the one we are going with. You can win Civilization V through various means, from Cultural, Diplomatic, Domination, Scientific, or just plain old hanging on by your fingernails until 2050. Which route will Bernie go? How will he react when foreign city-states start to get a bit frisky on his borders? Exactly how will he go about forging good relations with nations that are opposed to his own political leanings?
Will he smash Ghandi? That’s the real question here.
Tropico 6
Tropico 6 is the best entry in the series and is perfect for giving Bernie a solid moral test. You need to manage multiple islands in your little country, and grow it into an economic powerhouse. The game practically invites poor behavior, and the lure of dictatorship is ever present. Will you send agents to steal monuments from other countries, or will you have people hard at work building a solid transport infrastructure to act as the foundation for your economy? The populace in Tropico 6 wants a skilled leader to help them on their journey towards a brighter future.
Will he be a beloved leader or a feared dictator? Will the people cheer his name with passion and joy, or as part of a government mandated celebration where a lack of attendance will have the secret police bursting through your windows in the dead of night?
League of Legends
I don’t care if Bernie has slick mechanics and a sharpened understanding of the meta. I don’t care if he gets to Rank 1 in Challenger, or if he is Wood League for life. I want to see how he handles /All chat. I do also have a mild interest in knowing if he would main Ivern or Sylas, but that is beside the point. I want to see how Bernie handles it when the AP Aatrox top keeps pushing the lane too far without warding and is 0/4 three minutes in. I want to see how he reacts when he gets auto-filled to ADC and watches as his support last hits all the minions, then builds a Bramble Vest on Soraka. If he can’t keep his cool when Lee Sin dies to his own red buff, then he has zero chance of keeping his cool with some of the more erratic players on the world stage.
What will he do when his team is inting? Will he try to keep his team together with promises that they can outscale the opposition, or will he just run it down mid?
Published: Jun 27, 2019 09:35 am